Dialogues in Self Discovery

Do you dream?  Remember what it feels like to be in the dream.  And think about what you do when you wake up.  When we dream,  we experience the dream as real.  Although, an ear might be attuned to sounds in the house or nearby, which we will awake to – most of us experience total immersion in our dreams.  It is all very real to us – that dreamsite, if you will – until we wake up.  And when we wake up, we often remember the dream, as a dream.  Sometimes we may even have to remind ourselves that it was a dream – it was so real.  But we do know that the dream is over.  We shake off the feelings of the dream and move on with our waking life.  Last night as I was listening to Deepak Chopra describe the different states of consciousness – the dream state being one of them – I immediately thought about unhappiness.  In our unhappiness, we create a kind of dreamsite, a state of consciousness where we dwell in a reality of our creation.  And when we are in it, it feels so real, as if there were no other way to be.  But when we see that we don’t have to be unhappy – and we wake up – so to speak – we can shake it off and move on.  Because like dreams, unhappiness is self-created.  And that is such good news. Enjoy your waking up!

I had the wonderful experience yesterday of finding something I needed right under my nose. I was noodling around trying to come up with a visual for my new Option Method site – OptionForHappiness. As I often do, I grabbed the dog and we walked and walked in the park down the road. There’s a big field with a path round it that also leads to other paths. As we rounded it again and again, my mind was playing images of all the possibilities of what might work. Choice, choice in your own life, for your own happiness, I was thinking. The option to choose what you believe, to take the path you choose, etc., etc. My mind flipped through all the possibilities of artists who could create something special, or photos I had seen here and there, but of what, I wasn’t sure. So many possibilities! As I often do when I’m walking, I stopped and reminded myself to look outward, enjoy the scenery - look at what is right in front of me: the gorgeous just-blooming trees, the bright green of the open field, the dogs, people, bikes, strollers, the fork in the road. Another fork in the road. Another fork with a big beautiful tree in bloom right in the middle. If the tree could talk, it might have said, “Um, excuse me, over here, over here.” And I finally actually saw it. And realized how perfect it would be. A fork in the road – a little trite – ok, probably very trite – but so beautiful and right there in front of me. And I realized it didn’t mean that was the best choice.  I don’t always have to, or want to, choose what is right in front of me, but I love how so often we find our answers so effortlessly.   How in a world rich with information, images, posssibilities, we use our bodies and our senses and our amazing minds to zero in on what we love.  To decide. 
To choose.  To move on down the road.

Have you ever experienced feeling almost happy, almost content, almost at peace?  When everything seems fine, but there’s a nagging feeling that something is lurking around the corner?   Often that feeling of something lurking is our belief that we have to be constantly vigilant that something “bad” might happen if we don’t watch out.  And it is not an accident that this belief might pop up just as we are feeling good.  For some of us, it is our way of putting the brakes on happiness – just in case.  We believe we need to worry to avoid “bad” things happening in the future.  Consider this.  There is a difference between being vigilant and worrying about “bad” things happening.  We can be joyously vigilant and look under every rock and around every corner to avoid problems.  But if we are defining “bad” things as things that will by definition make us unhappy, what are we saying about our our happiness and unhappiness?  We are saying that there are things we will have to be unhappy about – that there are things that will prevent us from being happy.  So observe yourself this week to see if you are joyously vigilant or worrying that “bad” things are coming your way and threatening your happiness.  You are the only one who can make this choice for you.  Namaste!  Wendy Dolber, Option Method Teacher, author, The Guru Next Door, A Teacher’s Legacy.